Monday, June 25, 2012

Logicalizing

Sometimes I wish I could pull the logic out of my brain for just a little while. It's not like "I'm so smart it's a burden" or anything (or anything remotely close to that), but I too often find myself rationalizing things into oblivion and I can't help it. I'm a bit of a realist, a skeptic, and I blame it on what my brain considers to be logic. And sometimes I wish I could turn it off. It sounds so nice, to be able to just hope blindly or go through my day optimistically...without my brain whispering crazy logic into my ear. 

And I know this sounds loony, like I'm trying to get rid of my common sense - it's not that. It's like, rather than saying "Hey, I should give Susie a call," I think "I want to call Susie, but she's an hour ahead so it's later there and she goes to bed earlier than I do but there's still time for us to talk a little bit but I want to talk to her a lot so maybe I'll just call her tomorrow because then we can talk longer, as long as I'm calling her before I leave for my haircut and she might be at the gym because it's a Tuesday but I could leave a voicemail and then she'll call me Wednesday..." I'm not kidding. I really do this. I over-think everything. It's a blessing and a curse. But sometimes, just for a while, it seems like it would be really nice to go without it!

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