Profiler

7:29 AM

This drawing's kind of weird...the idea behind it is that I drew a man's profile (facing left) and then drew a guy's profile in the negative space instead of where it should have gone. Does that make sense? So the result is the creepy-looking guy on the left, but it was a fun drawing experiment anyway. It reminds me of the moon-guy-mascot from McDonald's back in the day, only creepier. And hairier.

Menver

Menver Part II

7:40 AM

Okay, just one more "Menver" reference.
Seriously, there were good-looking tall guys everywhere.
Maybe they weren't quite this tall, but you get the idea...

Menver

Greetings from Menver

7:05 AM

This past weekend, I got a chance to visit a friend who lives in Colorado near Denver.
It was a great time, and I had fun visiting and seeing the sights...but I couldn't help but notice that there are a lot of good-looking guys in Denver, Colorado. It was like walking around in an L.L. Bean catalog - they're all tall and wearing flannel and puffy vests and growing facial hair...very mountainy (see illustration). There just aren't that many guys in San Bernardino County. I've looked. They've all moved to Denver. Except, my friends and I now refer to it as "Menver" because that's where all the men are.

Turtles

Slow & Steady

7:31 AM

This is a drawing I did for a friend of mine...I can't remember why. I'm not sure I even knew at the time. I was just asked to draw a snail saying "Wheee" on top of a turtle shell. I really like how it turned out, even though it's just a simple cartoon. I know this idea has been done before - it's even briefly featured in the Arrested Development episode "Afternoon Delight" in which Uncle Oscar possesses a certain brand of cannabis called "Afternoon Deelite" with this on the packaging:


Anyway, I think it's kind of a clever idea, even though I'm clearly not the one who thought of it first.

Pumpkin

R.I.P. Boss-O-Lantern

7:21 AM

I wanted to show you what happened to my boss-o-lantern.
It died.
Like, it really died.
I knew it was going to decompose (I always sort of look forward to that part) but I didn't think it would go this quickly! When I left it last Friday, it still looked totally fine. Then I came back on Wednesday and it was covered in black mold. I should have known. It was so gross and oozy and squishy and disposing of it was actually quite difficult. Once I opened the pumpkin lid, I saw that the whole pumpkin was 2/3 filled with crazy mold that looked like gray cotton candy - and suddenly I was holding my breath because I was afraid I was going to breathe in deadly mold toxins. The whole thing was an ordeal. Next year I'm going to get rid of the pumpkin before it gets filled with crazy cotton candy mold. Good plan.

Michael

Only One Michael

7:39 AM

Since yesterday's post was a jillion Michaels, I thought I'd post this drawing today - it's a portrait I drew of Michael Field for work a few years ago. It's one of my faves. I'm still pretty hit-and-miss when it comes to protrait-drawing, so I get excited when it actually looks like the person. I like his lopsided hair and the look of hopefulness in his eyes...both in this sketch and in real life.

Michael

A Jillion Michaels

7:27 AM

A few days ago I was dining with some of my coworkers and we started talking about our hopes and dreams for the future. I believe the official conversation question posed was "When you're ninety years old and sitting in a rocking chair on your front porch, what do you hope you will have accomplished and what will you wish that you had done?" But I'm trying to simplify.

My friend Bobbi said that one of her dreams is to be a Jillian-Michaels-type trainer, someone that can inspire people physically, emotionally, spiritually, etc...(it's quite possible, since she's one of the most positive and healthy people I know.) But as she was first saying this, our coworker Michael was looking very confused. As she clarified who Jillian Michaels is (a trainer from the Biggest Loser), Michael looked relieved and said "Oh, I thought you said your dream was to have a jillion Michaels." We all laughed at the thought of Michael clones running everywhere.

For starters, the use of the number "a jillion" is pretty fantastic and takes me back to my third-grade self. And then we all started talking about what it would be like to have a jillion Michaels in the office, and we agreed it would be pretty great. So here's a glimpse of Bobbi's almost-dream: a jillion Michaels.

Bananaman & Co.

7:25 AM

This is a game of "Would You Rather?"
Would you rather be a dude with bananahorns sticking out of your hair?
Or a lady with Carmen Miranda fruit on her head at all times?

Personally, I lean towards the bananahorns simply because they're less conspicuous. I think a good beanie or cowboy hat could downplay their visibility. And with Carmen I think you'd attract a lot of birds and maybe even some brave rodents. But then again, you'd always have a snack on hand (more like on head) so maybe it's a pretty even match-up after all.

Ronald McDonald is the Creepiest.

7:58 AM


 This drawing is a tribute to the fact that Ronald McDonald is a pretty scary-looking mascot. Right? "He" came and spoke at my elementary school one time and even then, I remember being weirded out by him. He was doing a combination of magic tricks and talking about living responsibly, but I wanted none of it. You want 8-year-old Me to pay attention? Send a ninja turtle. Not a clown with striped tights and capri coveralls. But that's just my take on the subject.
Also, I'm afraid blogger hasn't been working right for me lately, so that's why this image might be appearing to be low-quality (I'm talking about pixels, not the caliber of this high-quality drawing.)

Birds

Birdcages

7:27 AM


We're starting out slow this week.
This is just a drawing of a bunch of birdcages...
and I don't have much to say about it, because it's just a bunch of birdcages.
I would like to point out, though, how badly I drew the little bird in the middle. Really? Can I not draw birds??

Trees

Office Painting

7:39 AM

I finally finished a painting for my office.
For some reason, I was determined to go find a big piece of plywood as a canvas for my project. I'm not much of a painter, and it's actually harder for me to paint on canvas because the canvas texture always ends up showing through...it's like I don't use enough paint. But when I draw on plywood, it's so smooth that I can manage to feel successful at the end of it. So I found my "canvas", grabbed some paints, and went to work.

I wanted a tree silhouette from the beginning, and I think it turned out well...but it's also lacking. I didn't mean for the whole thing to feel lopsided, with the tree only on one half. I'm still trying to brainstorm what could go on the left side. It only feels truly complete when one of my coworkers comes in and sits in the chair beneath it - the shades of yellow seem to fan out behind their head like a golden halo, and then it feels like that was my plan all along.

Elf

7:31 AM

This guy looks like he's up to no good. He's not supposed to be anyone in particular, but I think he looks like he could be the older brother of Legolas from Lord of the Rings. Maybe an evil older brother. I gave him pointy ears just because I have a thing for guys with pointy ears...which mainly only happens in sci-fi movies. I'm not sure it would be as cute in real life. But I'm telling you - if Samwise Gamgee ran into me at Starbucks and asked me out, I would definitely say yes.

Pumpkin

Angie-O-Lantern

8:04 AM

This is a different art form than what's normally on here, but it still counts.
On Monday I decided I wanted to carve a pumpkin - mainly because I watched my housemates carve a jack-o-lantern and it looked so fun. I couldn't shake the urge so I bought a pumpkin yesterday and carved it last night. I've never really taken the time to carve a pumpkin with great detail and I thought it seemed like a fun challenge. I originally was going to carve a celebrity's face (this pumpkin was almost Sean Connery) but then I thought it would be fun to have this be a jack-o-lantern for my office...and then I started brainstorming who I should carve on the office pumpkin.

It just seemed like a logical conclusion that I should make it an Angie-O-Lantern, since she's the fearless leader of our department. When we start misbehaving she has to remind us to make good choices, which is why her "Don't be stupid" motto is being proclaimed. It's just a dry sense of humor. She's a good boss, really. I don't think my pumpkin carving portrait skills here are super-accurate, but I think it's close enough that you can tell who it's supposed to be...and for my first time really carving, that's all I was really hoping for.





Dudes

Dudles (like doodles, but of dudes.)

7:40 AM

There's not much of a story to tell here, except that these are just some random doodles of random guys.
I find it much easier to draw guys than girls, mainly because I like drawing strong, straight jawlines and foreheads. So while I'm capable of drawing ladies, they typically end up looking pretty masculine with pointy chins. So I stick to guys, also because it's more fun to look at the end result (if you know what I mean)...except the guy with the ponytail. Whenever I draw someone's profile, I almost always draw them looking left...it has something to do with being right-handed. It's just way easier than drawing a person looking to the right. If I had to give everyone here a nickname, they would be Freckles, Big Eyes, Molestache, and Singletooth. See if you can guess who's who.

Snakes

Medusa Lady

7:34 AM

Welp, I'm back to pencil sketches.
Last week while I was on vacation, I was excited to have some free time for sketching and illustrating...and this is what I come up with. THIS?! A lady with medusa snake hair. Why? What could I possibly use this for? How will this drawing ever get me ahead in life? I'm not putting this in my portfolio. If I'm going to spend this much time on a drawing, it should at least be of a movie character or something recognizable...And why did I give her a nosering? What's with that? But when I sat down with my sketchbook, this is what I wanted to draw. A lady with snake hair, nosering and all. So there you have it.

Michael

Alex & Ears

7:26 AM

In the comic strip, I designed it so that Alex has really obnoxious coworkers because that makes things funnier. This isn't meant to be autobiographical - my coworkers are very lovable...but I might have designed this guy after my coworker, Michael. I couldn't resist giving him the hair (skinny jeans not pictured).

SmartAlex

Alex & Travis

7:44 AM

This is the boy that serves as Alex's love interest in the comic strip.
His name is Travis. He has dimples, good hair, and he discusses sci-fi movies with intelligence and depth...
Everything a girl could ask for.

SmartAlex

Alex & Politics

7:40 AM

This is a very autobiographical comic.
The 2008 election is the most involved in politics I have ever been, and a lot of that had to do with Tina Fey dressed up as Sarah Palin. That made me tune in. I wanted to vote for McCain just so I could have four years of Tina Palin. Saturday Night Live is where I caught up on all my election info, particularly during "REALLY?! with Seth and Amy." It was a great era of political satire, and I haven't paid attention to politcs at all since then. I had to google the word "politics" just to get some ideas for keywords to have Alex mentioning in the first word bubble. I'm pretty sure she's just saying mumbo jumbo, and that's half the joke for me - that I can't even think of something politically intelligent to say here.
If only Tina Fey was around to make it interesting.

SmartAlex

Smart Alex

7:11 AM

This is a very special week. It's comic strip week!
I'm out of town until Saturday, so I will not have the time I normally do to sketch things on a daily basis and post them. Instead, we're going to journey through some comic strips I drew earlier this year. Being a comic strip artist has been one of my dream jobs ever since I was a kid, and a few months ago I decided to create my own...just for fun.

It's called Smart Alex (because I'm a smart-aleck and I love a good play on words) and centers around a girl named Alex (Alexis) and her quirky friends. Alex is a cartoon version of me and often says what I'm thinking. For instance, whenever someone casually mentions that they forgot to eat lunch, I always think and want to say the phrase "I don't understand what you just said" because the idea of missing a meal is so foreign to me.

Trees

Tree Male

7:35 AM


This is going to be a random post, but here we go.
There's this tree outside my office...I stare at it all day.
It's right across the street from my office window.
I swear the tree is walking towards me (see illustration.)
The tree totally has legs (and maybe bell bottom pants) and, as odd as it is,
I find my eyes always go straight to the crotch,
and then I feel creepy for looking at the tree's crotch.
But it's a weird-looking tree, right? It's not normal.
Most trees don't even have crotches.

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